版主說過，台灣學到的英文到了國外很多時候會派不上用場，原因之一是單字量不夠，其次是不明瞭單字正確的使用場合。我們通常是去死背單字，頂多加背一兩個例句，所學的英文完全沒有前言和後語，以致於在實際運用的場合常會瞠目結舌，不知如何與老外應對。

唯有多聽多看才能夠增進英文聽力。版主這幾年透過 “Youtube” 以及 Apple 的 “Podcast”下載了許多影片，常趁者搭乘捷運的零碎時間增進自己的英文聽力。今天就來講解老美脫口秀。這段脫口秀 是關於 Hot Pocket (美國常見的一種微波速食)，內容十分爆笑且老少咸宜，版主整理段子中的重要單字並稍加講解，希望能幫助網友聽懂段子的內容。

◎ good to see I’m not the only white trash here.
white trash - 白鬼 (歧視美國白人的說法)。 

 

◎ Did I eat it or rub it on my FACE?!
到底我吃下 Hot Pocket 或者將它抹在臉上？！

 

◎ They have a warning printed on the side. ”Warning: you just bought hot pockets! Hope you’re drunk or heading home to a trailer. You hillbilly enjoy the next nascar event.”
hillbilly - 白鬼 (歧視美國白人的說法)。 
trailer - 拖車。 
nascar event - 美國汽車協會 (National Association of Stock Car Auto Racing) 的比賽。

 

◎  For tonight’s special, we have a sea bass, which is broiled and we have a hot pocket, which is cooked in a dirty microwave. And that comes with a side to pep up.
餐廳服務員報告今日特餐的內容。 
side = side dish 小菜 
pep up = 提味

 

◎ 下面是顧客與餐廳服務生的有趣對話：
顧客：”Is your hot pocket cold in the middle?”  (Hot Pocket 中間是冷的嗎？)
餐廳服務生：”It’s frozen. But it can be served boiling lava hot.” (Hot Pocket 中間是冷凍的，但是可以加熱到跟岩漿一樣熱)
顧客：”Will it burn my mouth?” (這樣會燙傷我的嘴巴嗎？)
餐廳服務生：”It’ll DESTROY your mouth. Everything will taste like rubber for a month.” (它會摧毀你的嘴巴，之後一個月內什麼東西吃下去都味如嚼蠟。)
顧客：”I’ll have the hot pocket.” (那我要點熱 Hot Pocket！ )

 

◎ “Hey. I’ve got an idea. How about we fill a poptart with nasty meat. Cook it in a sleeve thing and dump it in the toilet.”
挖苦廠商想出 Hot Pocket 的爆笑說法。 

 

◎ “There is a vegetarian hotpocket for those of us who don’t want to eat meat but still would like to have diarrhea. HOT POCKET!!! It should just come with a roll of toilet paper. DIARRHEA POCKET!!!”
表示有素食 Hot Pocket，適合於那些不吃肉，又想拉肚子的人食用，那種東西應該附贈一捲衛生紙。

 

◎ “There’s The Lean Pocket, I Don’t Even want to know What’s In There. Imagein The Directions…Take Out Of Box Place Directly In The Toliet….FLUSH POCKET!!”

 

◎ Recently they introduced the breakfast Hot Pocket. Finally! I can’t think of a better way to start the day. GOOD MORNING! you’re about to call in sick. HOT POCKET!!!
表示早餐吃了 Hot Pocket 之後就得打電話報病號。 

 

◎ “You can have a hotpocket for breakfast.. a hotpocket for lunch and be DEAD by dinner……..deadddd pocketssss”
表示早餐吃 Hot Pocket，午餐吃 Hot Pocket， 晚餐就會嗝斃。

 

◎ Now they’re just messing with us. Just a matter of time. Have you tried the hot pocket hot pocket. It’s a hot pocket filled with a hot pocket, tastes just like a hot pocket. I’m gonna go stick my head in a microwave - HOT POCKET!!!