版主說過，台灣學到的英文到了國外很多時候派不上用場，我們通常是死背單字，所學的英文完全沒有前言和後語，以致於在實際運用的場合常會瞠目結舌，不知如何與老外應對。

唯有多聽多看才能夠增進英文聽力，習慣老外的語調與說話速度。今天這段脫口秀是關於 Drunken Driving and Presidential Elections  (酒醉駕車與美國總統大選)，內容十分爆笑且老少咸宜，脫口秀的諧星名叫 Gabriel Iglesias，有高超的口技，能模仿許多動物或機器聲響。版主整理段子中的重要單字並稍加講解，希望能有所幫助。

◎ “shut up, stupid!”
酒醉蛇行時，被後方卡車按喇叭，不爽地回頭叫對方閉嘴。

◎ “One of two things will pop in your head.”
腦中會浮現兩件事情。
1. I’m okay. I’m fine. I can beat this.
我可以逃過這一劫的 (beat 有勝過的意思)。

2. I’m gonna go to jail.
我鐵定要吃牢飯了。

◎ “i gotta let chu go babe ima go to jail…tellda kids i love em.”
老墨的口音，超速的人知道自己要吃牢飯之後，打電話與妻訣別，並要她轉告小孩他愛他們。

◎ “get pulled over for drunken driving.”
因為酒駕被警察攔下來。

◎ “You have no idea how bad you’re gonna throw his ass off.”
版主查不到切確的意思，從上下文判斷，應該是讓警察很出乎意料或吃驚的意思。

◎ “He was here a second ago. me drive? hell no man, I’m fucked up!”
fuck up (口語) = 搞糟、弄亂、弄糊塗 (make someone very unhappy or confused so that they cannot control their life)
Heroin will fuck you up. 

版主記得，慾望城市的 Miranda 有次扭傷脖子之後躺在浴室，死命打電話求救時說了這句：I’m fucked up! (我動不了啦!)。
 

◎ And it’s sad i know some of you are gonna try that tonight. Do what the fat guy says, and for the record I’m not fat.  I’m fluffy. theres 5 levels and fluffy is one of the levels: Big, Healthy, Hucky, fluffy, and DAMN!!! I’m still at number 4.

1. Hucky = A term mothers often use to say to their overweight son when the son says he is fat.  / One who is fat while still maintaining a “proper” body shape. Husky people are usually of healthy weight.
Josh: No mom, those jeans wont fit, im fat.
Josh’s Mom: Oh josh, your not fat, just husky, its a good thing, girls like husky.

2. Fluffy = another word to describe a overweight person.
“I’m not fat. I’m fluffy.”

◎ Mr. President, question..it’s been over a year what is your plan for Katrina?..”We’re gunna find her, and we’re gonna bring her to justice. She link with Al-Kada cause they both start with a k “.
挖苦布希總統的一段笑話。

◎ ”we don’t vote for presidents, we vote for ‘SHE BANG SHE BANG!’”

she bang    
 - A women looking for sex. Horny
Ohh, she bang.

◎ ”call it something catchy like ‘Who’s gonna run this bitch’!”  

◎ ”hehe, I knew you’d be back. That’s right. I know you miss your daddy.”
模仿美國前總統 Bill Clinton。

 

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