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英文翻譯練習:林燿德《海》
撰文者: Wayne 發表日期: February 18, 2010 – 9:55 am

♣ (版主執筆翻譯中文) ♣

翻譯這篇文章時,內心百感交集。已故詩人林燿德在耀眼的年歲寫下這篇波瀾狀闊的散文,字字句句充滿情感,時而堅毅剛強,時而柔美華麗。如今,他雖身處隔岸,不問塵世俗物,仍祝願他的篇章能夠世代傳頌下去。

《海》
The Sea

1

自隨波潮輕晃的甲板步下梯口,站在碼頭上,抬頭纔發現面前群山訇訇向我逼來,滿天陰霾靜靜向遠處推廓而去。灰雲的威力壓下山脈的稜線,太陽此刻是藏匿在聖櫃中的一朵金菡萏,在沒有關緊的櫃門間隙,流洩幾道橙色的光,緩緩沉落,讖語般的色澤,在我心頭蒙上一層薄紗似的寒意。

translationStepping down the gently swaying ladder, I stood on the pier and then raised my eyes, noticing that rolling hills loomed ahead of me, while a veiling haze was silently vanishing into the distance. Dark clouds seemed to overpower the hill ridges. At that moment, the gracefully sinking sun resembled a golden lotus in a holy chest, radiating orange rays through the gap between the doors not shut properly, and the prophecy-revealing color veiled my mind with chilliness.

回首,龐大的武裝運輸艦,正以鬱綠的舷壁無言地擋回我仰視的目光,目光在鴻蒙中折射的回聲,撞擊著我空闊的胸腔;艦艗上空閒出來的兩對小艇吊架,淺灰色的巨形鋼架,猶如倒豎的蟹腳向兩側伸起。強大的四○釐米炮管,在艦身上顯得纖巧無比,僵直堅挺地憩息。鐵獸之後,是海。

translation I turned around and saw the colossal armed transport vessel, whose dark green side wall blocked my upward view silently. The echo created by the refraction of my view in the mist kept beating my broad chest. On the vessel, two pairs of boat davits were lying idle. Their colossal  steel frames of light grey resembled crab legs standing on end and protruding from both sides. Several 40-centimeter barrels, while powerful, looked extremely delicate as compared with the vessel. They were taking a rest in a rigid and firm manner. Beyond the iron beast lied the sea.

我繼續走著,便看到海,那不斷用光書寫蛟篆的流體,向堤外無限延展,除了幾座紅色的燈塔,像西洋棋子般在海圖邊陬佇立,水平線用距離的魔力吞沒了整個太平洋上的島嶼。海,以超越生命的感知不斷運動著,它是動的極致,但在我心靈的視野中,它卻靜似一塊亙古不動的浮雕,和我外套上的縐褶粘連疊合在一起。動的是我在微雨裏移走的形象。

translation I kept walking. Then, I saw the sea, a fluid constantly writing Chinese bronze inscriptions with light, that extended to infinity beyond the jetty. Except several red beacons standing by the corner of the sea territory like chess pieces, the horizon engulfed all the islands spreading across the Pacific Ocean using the magic of distance. The sea, in constant motion beyond perception, was the ultimate movement;  In my mind, however, she was an embossment that had been standing still since the beginning of the age and, at the same time, sticked to the velcros on my coat. What was actually moving was the silhouette of me walking in a light drizzle.

我的腳步踏準了大地的呼吸,即使隔著一層人工的柏油路面,我仍然抓住被自然隱藏的節拍;這令我思及你的信,打開折疊的平面,便可聽到你均勻的脈搏,和我的心音參差地混聲,那奧妙,似海與大地的聯手。出海的日子,我與海素面相對,它埋藏的無數境界,一一與我聯想的軌道接通,我的思考侵入永恆的鬼蜮,浸泡在如沉澱著黑色物質的福馬林液般的歷史裡……。

translation Walking my steps right on the breath of the earth, I could capture the rhythm hidden in nature even though there existed a layer of asphalt pavement between me and the earth. This gave my thought to your letters. Every time I open a folded letter from you, I hear your pulse beating regularly and mixing the sound of my heart in a ragged fashion, creating a mystery that seems to have been evoked through the concerted efforts of the sea and the land. When I am out on the sea, I watch the sea face to face, knowing that it buries myriads of realms that connect to each and every rail of my imagination. My thought invades the mysterious realm of infinity, soaked in histroy that resembles, to some extent, a formalin solution containing precipitates of a dark raven hue…

在海上思想你,以為你比海還大,起伏的波濤不過是你解在枕上的酥髮;海將我帶入更為冷冽的空間,我本來就缺乏詩人溫熱的血液,而你的意志是在文明的冰櫃中取出我被霜雪包裹的腦髓。

translation While thinking about you out on the sea, I am under the impression that you are bigger than the sea, for the undulating waves are nothing but your hair spread ng out on the pillow. The sea brings me into a much chiller space. What’s worse, I myself lacks the warm blood a poet usually possesses. Fortunately, your determination helps fetch my brain freezed in the frost and snow formed in the refrigerator of the cultural world.

2


走在傍山蜿蜒的狹長港灣上,雨水打在我的臉上,遠山近山在我眼前一一讓開,再讓開,讓開一條白色的道路,將我帶出港灣、帶向車站。我終於意識到自己是被你強大的生命力所飼養的。我一直跌落在精神與肉體的深淵裏,你提起我,提起上帝也提不起的我,在那深淵裏浮升的,是連我自己都感到震驚的白色陸地。

translation While I was walking along the long, narrow harbor wandering along the hills on one side, the rain kept beating down on my face. The hills, near and far, stepped aside right before my eyes, making way for me unceasingly and paving out a white road that brought me out of the harbor and then to the station. I finally came to the understanding that I was being raised by your strong vitality. I kept falling into an abyss of spirituality and carnal desires. It was you who raised me, a man even the Almighty God is incapable of lifting up. What was floating deep down in the abyss was a white piece of land, which gave me quite a shock.

北宜公路上大霧彌漫,我好似渡在你思慕的海上。走出海的磁場,卻走不出你的磁場;想告訴你有關海的種種,但是見面時我必是一個字也脫不了口。很久沒有提筆了,望向窗外,看到我那被你的才華切下的十指,在霧的深處站成十座參差的白塔。

translation Dense fog was covering the Tapei-Ilan Highway. Travelling along it made me feel that I was ferrying across the sea admired by you. I managed to get out of the sea’s magnetic field, but, for some unknown reasons, I couldn’t escape from your magnetic field. Athough I was eager to tell you everything about the sea, somehow I had visions of my inablity to utter even a word when we met. It was a long time ago when I last wrote to you; looking out of the window, I saw my ten fingers, cut off by your talent, standing deep down in the mist like ten white towers of varied heights.

自然有時是最安靜的。

translation Sometimes, nature makes for a scene of the utmost tranquility.

如果久久佇立在艦橋上,風浪和車葉反復規律的咆哮,都會漸漸削弱、平息,只遺留下完全寂然的視覺 – 因為一切的聲籟,皆摒除在澄澈空靈的心境外。

translation If you stand still on the bridge long enough, you will notice that the repeated, regular roar of the wind, waves, and the propellers is on the wane, eventually disappearing and only leaving behind your sense of sight steeped in absolute silence — for all the sounds around have been kept from reaching your mind of clarity and purity.

站在艦橋上,我的視覺被自然的變幻詭譎深深吸引,傍晚的彤雲在頭頂翻滾、紫色與金色交錯的浪在舷側摩挲徘徊。如果自夕陽的方位駛來一艘友艦,必定會先伸出檣桅,遙遙向我打招呼;孤獨、單薄卻令人感到堅毅無比的檣桅,在陰濕冰冷的海平線上緩緩升起。

translation When I stand on the bridge, my eyes are always deeply attracted to the changing façade of mystrious nature.  As twilight encroaches, red clouds  billow overhead while the waves of mixed colors of purple and gold are wandering around and stroking the sides of the vessel. If a consort vessel is approaching from the  sunset direction, she will first reach out her mast , greeting me in the distance. The mast, lonely and thin and yet showing unswering determination, will rise slowly above the dank horizon.

逆光的桅杆在望遠鏡中是純黑色的,它切開落日迷離的光暈,帶著些許神秘的傳說色彩;船體在流蕩的光氛中伴隨檣桅的拔高、而搖搖擺擺地現形,這時明滅的燈號開始穿梭在兩艦間的海域上。多麼興奮、喜悅的資訊!茫茫海上,形單影隻的寂寞感暫時卸脫了;我被海洋的遼闊深深感動,也意識到自己對於陸地有一種不存在的依戀。

translation Viewed through a binoculars, the mast silhouetted against sunlight becomes an utterly black. It severs the faint halo surrounding the westerly sun, bearing a hint  of  the charm of a mysteirous legend. As the mast is rising,  the vessel, enshrouded in the wandering mist of light, will appear wobbling on.  This is the moment when flash light signals start travelling back and forth across the waters between the two vessels. What an exciting and joyful message! The lonliness I feel when confronted with the boundless ocean disappears for the time being. I am deeply touched by the vast expanses of the sea, realizing I do have a nonexistent attachment for land.

3


生活在海上的人,總是在心中攜帶著一塊屬於自己的陸地,泥土和岩石在水兵的感覺裏,是多麼溫馨和珍貴;船航行得再遠,心中的岸總是緊緊跟著。

translation Those living on the sea always carry in their minds a piece of land that belongs to themselves only. For a seaman, soil and rock are extremely precious, giving him a cosy feel and mood; no matter how far the vessel has gone, this piece of land in his mind is still following him closely.

跟著我的岸,上面蔓生著無數的薔薇;思念你的時候,我心中的薔薇花蕾便忍不住、忍不住紛紛破碎……,它們鮮麗的汁液激射在無垠的天幕上,潑灑在無際的海洋裏。

translation Countless roses sprawl and scramble over the piece of land following me. When I miss you, the roses growing in my heart can’t help breaking into pieces one after another… Their brightly colored sap shoots onto the boundless expanses of the sky and splashes into the limitless expanses of the sea.

晴天的時候,站在甲板表面,抬頭注視著矗立的檣桅,仰角的視界裏,鐵灰色的十字架好似正頂觸蒼穹。白雲幻化成種種巨獸,如同即將挾帶千鈞力道撲下一般,壓迫著我的胸口;只有像槍桿上的準星同樣堅挺不撓的檣桅,才無視于風雲的威力。此刻,我心中繁茂的薔薇,便盤繞著檣桅而上,在晴空下華麗柔美地綻開。

translation On clear days when I stand on the deck looking up at the towering mast, the iron-grey cross, in my upward view, seems to be touching and pushing the overarching sky. White clouds morph into various shapes of giant beasts, relentlessly pressing my chest, about to swoop down, as it were, with the force of a thounderbolt. Only the mast, as tough and determined as the front sight of a gun, is unafraid of the sheer brute force exerted by the wind and clouds. At that moment, the roses growing vigorously in my mind start to climb twining round the mast, finally putting forth gorgeous and graceful blossoms under the clear sky.

海洋,龐大而神秘,如同一枚沒有瞳孔的巨眼,這裏是光的牧場,魚龍的搖籃與墳場;撕不開、砍不斷,永遠用一道線縫住天空的海洋,是地球一切生靈的起源,也是個最最古老的母親。

translation The sea, huge and mysterious, resembles a gigantic eye without the pupil. She is a pasture for light as well as a cradle and a grave for Ichthyosaurs; the sea sews up the sky with a thread, and the stitches can neither be tore off nor chopped off. She is, in truth, the place where life comes, hence the oldest of the oldest mother.

水兵們的浪漫和神勇:把舵、爬桅以及狂歌,在海洋的眼中,也不過是孩子般的淘氣舉動罷了。飄泊海上的男子們,都嗜好在閒下來的時候,雙臂依靠著扶欄,靜靜地望著無垠無盡的藍色。在搖擺的甲板上,頂著風,任濤聲涮洗去一切憂鬱,讓那碧意穿透胸襟。如此,就是閉起眼睛,也可以感受到她無法抗拒的召喚。

translation Seamen’s romance and bravery, whether it be steering, climbing the mast, or singing wildly, are nothing but children’s mischievous acts in the eyes of the sea. When they have free time, men sailing over the sea like to watch the boundless blue silently, with their arms leaning on the handrail. They stand on the swinging deck agaisnt the wind, letting the sound of the waves wash away their blues, allowing the blue expanses to penetrate and fill their chests. By doing so, the seamen can feel her irresistible calls even with their eyes closed.

每當我注視海洋良久,一旦閉起眼睛,整個海洋的遼闊氣象,都滾湧在我的胸臆中。海正替地球進行著永恆無間的洗禮,日月升沉,潮汐起落,面對海洋,我感悟到:猶似柔軟而巨大的棺蓋,海洋正埋藏著生命與文明的昨日。在這無垠的空間中,人間所有的遺憾和怨恨,都顯得多麼的卑猥小氣,該和海洋學習著包容和博大,該將視線投向最遙遠的彼岸……。

translation Whenever I close my eyes after having watched the ocean for a long time, the whole boundless expanses of the sea seem to be churning up within my chest. The sea has been cleansing the earth with water nonstop since the begining of time. Reflecting on the rise and set of the sun and the moon as well as the daily high and low tides, I come to realize that the ocean is like a soft and gigantic pall of death that buries life and civilization of the past.  All regret and resentment occurring in this world are so trivial and unimportant compared to this boundless space. I should learn from the sea about tolerance and profundity. I should also cast my view to the farthest shore…

4


風平浪靜的時刻,海是一件清涼喜悅的外衣,溫柔地披掛在水兵肩上;水兵們的心情,也像他們藍領巾上的白色水兵紋一般筆直平穩。風浪惡劣的時候,海洋不再是慈藹的母親,而是一個壞脾氣的女郎。潑辣地擊打船舷,浪越過甲板,從左舷騰起、自右舷翻落;最險的風浪會使資格最老的水兵都感到暈眩。

translation When she is calm and placid, the sea is like a cool and pleasant outer garment draped over seamen’s shoulders; at that time, the seamen’s mood is as straight and smooth as the white stripes on their blue neckerchiefs. However, when angered and agitated, the sea is no longer a kind mother, but rather a bad-tempered girl, who will pound the vessel sides violently. The waves will roar across the deck, rising from the left side and diving into the right side. Even the most veteran seamen will feel sick and dizzy when confronted with the most tumultuous waves.

有一次駛向南竿,風浪險惡,黯黯行雲流經陰霾的海面,船身左右的搖擺超過了四十度。艦長正襟危坐在迴旋椅上,他的臉龐沉浸在黝黑的空間裏,朦朧的側影流離著一道光纖,自帽沿經過多紋的額頭、瑩亮的墨鏡、挺直的鼻樑、宏亮地傳出車舵令的唇瓣、直到剛毅的下頷,勾勒出一個海軍中校鐵鑄般堅定的面容──他正視著眼前澎湃的海洋,也正視著自己投注一生的事業。

translation I remember I once sailed toward Nankan. While the vessel were gliding over the sea enveloped by darkness, the monstrous waves rocked the vessel, causing it to sway tilting at an angle of more than 40 degrees. The captain, sitting on a rotating chair, looked pretty serious. The dim profile of his face submerged in darkness was outlined by a ray of light, which ran from the visor to his forehead with wrinkles, past his glossy sunglasses and the high bridge of his nose, then by his lips that gave engine and rudder commands in a loud voice, until it stopped against his steadfast chin. This ray of light sketched the ‘cast-iron’ resolute face of a typical Commander, who was looking squarely at the surging and rolling waves and also at the career he had spent his entire life building.

「雙車進四!」艦長清晰、嘹亮、短捷而鎮定的車舵令,透過傳話筒通達艦橋正下方的舵房。掌舵的「孩子們」(艦長是如此暱稱著視如子弟的水兵們),聽到他的聲音,都得到一股安定的力量,使他們在劇烈顛簸的空間裡保持著高昂的鬥志。不論水平儀上的指針如何不安的徘徊在刻度之間,他們的心永遠定在海圖所標示的箭頭上。

translation “Both engines full ahead!” This engine and rudder command issued by the captain was clear, loud, short, and calm, reaching the rudder room beneath the bridge through the mouthpiece. Hearing the captain’s voice, the “boys” (the nickname given by the captain to the seamen he treated as his children) taking the helm immediately found strength to keep their composure and maintain rock solid morale in the jolting space. No matter how uneasily the pointer lingered over the scale on the level sensor, their thoughts were fixed on the arrow marked on the sea chart.

我倚靠著豎立在艦橋中央的電動羅盤,電動羅盤高度及胸,隨著航行方位的變換,發出「格」、「格」的聲響,每變換一度的方位,就發出一響。那清脆的聲響應和著窗外的濤聲,帶給我一種奧妙而莫名的震撼。

translation I leaned against the electric compass erected in the center of the bridge. The compass stood as high as my chest and emitted rattle sounds with the change of the navigation direction. Whenever the direction shifted by one degree, the compass gave forth one sound. Those crispy sounds, coupled with the sounds  of  waves coming from outside of the windows, gave me a mysterious, inexplicable shock.

天色漸漸黯淡,電動羅盤的內緣亮起一圈燈火。我的視野越過艦長的側影,俯瞰鐵灰色的艦身。它像是一尾勇猛的巨鯨,在黑暗而奧秘的海面破浪前進,龐碩的艦身升沈著,伴隨著規律的節奏;舉目四望,迷茫的夜空已與黑色的海洋緊緊粘合在一起,找不出接縫的地方。海平線消失了,渾然若創世紀前的荒涼一般,在這個無月的夜晚,我感歎著人類於天地間奮鬥不撓的精神與意志,內心燃燒起熾烈的火焰……。

translation It was getting dark. The inner rim of the electric compass had been illuminated. My view flied over the captain’s silhouette and looked down at the iron grey vessel, which was like a brave and powerful whale plowing across the dark, mysterious sea. The gigantic vessel kept rising and falling with a regular rhythm. Looking around, I noticed that the hazy night sky and the dark sea had already merged together as a seamless whole. The horizon had disappeared and the world around seemed to be as primeval as it was before the creation of the earth. On that moonless night, I marveled at the unswerving spirit and determination we human beings had been showing in fighting for survival on earth. My heart was burning with blazing flames…

搶灘,是一種微妙而令人永不厭倦的體驗。LST(登陸艦)對準島嶼前進,鋪滿黃色砂礫的灘頭被綠色的丘陵拱繞著,不斷向我的視野逼來。遙遠的島嶼,陌生的灘頭,原本祇存在於模糊的觀念中,現在卻浮露出碧藍的海面,在眼前畢現,我的心底激盪著興奮的情緒。艦長挺直腰杆,雙手握住艦橋前側的扶欄,每一道車舵令都堅毅果決,穩穩地將艦身帶入狹隘的海灣。

translation Landing on the shore is a subtle experience one will never get tired of. The LST (Landing Ship, Tank) was moving toward the island, and the beachhead, covered with yellow gravel and surrounded by green hills, kept closing in on me. At first the remote island and strange beachhead were a fuzzy concept to me. But at that moment they were floating on the blue expanse of the ocean right before my eyes. I could feel feverish excitement surging through my veins. The captain stood arrow straight with his hands holding the handrail at the front of the bridge. He issued every engine and rudder command quickly and confidently, smoothly ushering the vessel into the narrow bay.

5


霎時,艦首滑上了砂灘,輕微而短暫的震動之後,一股沉穩的安定感襲上心頭。船靠上了灘頭,在長久的航行之後,踩著不再搖晃的甲板,反而感到不習慣。眼前,為戰爭而屹立不搖的島嶼,正展現它傳說中嵯峨的身姿,歡迎著我們;一群陸軍士兵己候守多時,他們奔向艦身的腳步,充滿著喜悅的節奏……。

translation In a moment, the bow glided onto the shore. A sense of composure and stability arose in me after soft, short vibrations subsided. After the vessel had landed on the shore, the deck no longer swayed, but, strangely enough, I felt uneasy walking on it after such a long voyage. Standing firm during the war, the island right before us shows its towering facade as a gesture of welcome. A group of army soldiers had been waiting there for a long time. They ran to the vessel with steps full of  joyful rhythms…

停泊在外島的冬夜,面臨凜冽的寒風與敵前的緊張氣息,值夜更的心情格外地不同。備戰中的軍艦,關閉了所有的燈火。在無月之夜,黑幢幢的艦體,猶似一隻蟄伏在黑暗中蓄勢待發的巨獸,四十釐米炮維持著三十度的仰角,炮座裏值勤的水兵,動也不動地望著黑色的海域,隨時注意著艦橋傳來的無線電訊。

translation When our vessel was anchored in this outer island, I felt quite differently while I was on night duty because of the piercing  wind of the winter night and the tension running high in the presence of the enemy. The lights were all out on our vessel preparing for war. On the moonless night, the dark vessel was like a gigantic beast crouching in the darkness ready to deliver an attack. The 40-centimeter gun was set at an elevation of thirty degrees. The seamen on duty was sitting in the gun house motionless while watching the dark seas and paying attention to radio signals that may come from the bridge at any time.

我佩掛著點四五手槍,被艦橋裏幽暗的氛圍所籠罩。拿著望遠鏡,搜尋著黑色的海面,不能放過任何一個浮動的目標。但是我的視野所及之處,所有的景觀都像是曝了光的黑白膠捲,除了黑色,還是更深沉的黑色……。

translation Armed with a .45 pistol, I was shrouded in darkness within the bridge. I scanned the dark sea with my field glasses looking for a hint of any floating target. However, all the images in my view were like exposed films showing black and white. Except darkness, I could see nothing else but an even deeper darkness…

你喜歡海軍黑色的冬服嗎?我對於黑制服有一種特別的感情,因為我在台海的第一次航行,便是穿著這一套黑制服。瘂弦來信說:「卅年前,海軍少尉是一個很浪漫的名詞」,卅年後,「海軍少尉」的身分,不僅帶給我如薔薇般浪漫的詩意,也造就了我和檣桅一樣剛毅的意志。

translation Do you like the Navy’s Winter Blue uniform? I have a special feeling for the Winter Blue uniform because I was wearing it during my first voyage along the Taiwan Strait. A letter from poet Ya Xuan says, “Sub-Lieutenant was a very romantic term thirty years ago.” Well, thirty years later, the rank of Sub-Lieutenant not only gives me poetry as romantic as roses, but also strengthens my determination making it as resolute as a mast.

寫這樣的長信給你,我的確感到些微的吃力,因為你和海洋,都是最偉大的傾聽者,我的航程,卻說也說不盡……。

translation Writing such a long letter to you is indeed a little strenous, because both you and the sea are the greatest listeners, but I could never say enough about my voyage…

6


我走在臺北的街道上,穿過大廈的陰影,在都市五彩的夜裏,想到船是另一種形態的都市、一種密閉封鎖的試管社會;想到我的兄弟們仍在海上。他們用糾結的臂肌牽引著粗大的纜繩,用堅強的意志把持木質的舵柄;他們在寒冷的甲板上頂著狂風,坐鎮炮位;在酷熱的艙底,一身油污地操縱輪機。當他們望向白天的海洋,海平線在水兵的瞳孔中,永遠是一道最不安的直線,蹺蹺板似地向兩端擺蕩不止。

translation While I was walking on the streets in Taipei passing through the shadows cast by buildings, I thought, under the city’s colorful night, that a ship could be regarded as an another form of city, or a  blocked virtual society. Also, I thought of my seaman brothers who were still out on the sea. They must be dragging thick ropes with thier tangled arm muscles, or using the wooden helm to guide the ship with steadfast determination. They must be sitting in the gun house against the cold wind sweeping across the deck, or be busy in controlling the turbines in the extremely hot bilges, their whole bodies covered with grime and grease. When they watch the sea during the day, the horizon in their pupils always looks like a restless straight line, swaying from side to side just as a seesaw does.

在海上的時候,我對於海洋的驚歎,就像是一隻隻的白鯨,以優美的姿勢,自懷中滑落無垠的藍色宇宙裏。穿上厚重的防寒夾克,站在艦橋的週邊,戴著黑色斷指手套的雙手緊握圍欄,我的視線自黑色的帽檐下透過墨鏡投向遠方,看著海峽蔚藍的浪花,吞吐著每一個嶄新的早晨。

translation When I am out on the sea, my admirations for the sea are like white whales that are gracefully slipping into the boundless, bluse expanses  one after another from my arms. I often stand around the bridge wearing a thick cold-weather jacket, with my hands in black fingerless golves firmly holding the handrail. After my view travels from my cap’s black visor, through my sunglasses, and then into the distance, I see the blue waves in the strait breathe in and out a brand new morning.

旭日自海面露臉以前,曙光已擦亮了海平線,把擁抱成同一種黑色的海與天,輕脆地掰開。在靚空中不斷變幻色彩的積雲,以及在海面上繼續擁戴著光的羽翼,向八方旅行的波峰,將大自然的意志自暗夜的斗篷中釋放出來,整個世界在金色和橙色的氛圍間蘇醒。

translation Before the sun rises above the sea, the first rays of the morning sunlight have already lit up the horizon, gently breaking apart the sea and the sky that embraced each other into a black unity. Clouds keep changing colors in the azure sky, sea birds reflecting the sunlight are flying over the sea, and wave crests are travelling in all directions – all of these unveil the cloak of the dark night to release the determination of nature. The whole world suddenly wake up in an atmosphere that is the color of gold and orange.

正視著浮現的太陽,我遺忘了寒冷,甚至遺忘了船和自我的存在,耳際波波的浪濤,仿佛是承襲自雲頂的仙樂。海的力量是不可抗拒的,她規律的呼吸,將我胸坎刷洗得透明,想到了故人李磬愛說佛經裏阿修羅的故事 —

translation Staring at the rising sun, I forget the cold, even the existence of the vessel and myself. My ears resound with the splashing sounds of the waves that seem to be music from heaven. The sea has an irresistible power; her regular rhythms of breathing wash my chest, making it clean and transparent. I suddenly think of a story about Asuras from Buddhist scriptures that my friend Li Qing used to tell:

他們穿梭於四天下,採擷各種鮮麗的花朵,要釀花酒於海,結果當然是失敗了,海依舊是海,沒有變成甘醇的酥酒。我很喜悅阿修羅的天真,能夠實踐自己的憧憬,即使失敗,那無窮的悵恨中,總隱藏著一絲詭異的滿足吧。

translation These deities shuttled around the four continents to gather all kinds of brightly colored flowers trying to turn the sea into flower wine through fermentation. It goes without saying that all their efforts were in vain. The sea remained as it was, not fermenting into full-bodied wine. However, I like the naivety Asuras showed in making endeavors to carry out their dearest dream. Although the dream crumbled to nothing, they might have had some sort of weird satisfaction hidden in their infinite regret.

7


我進入一輛計程車的後座,整條路都被僵滯的車陣填滿,不管路口是紅燈還是綠燈,車子依舊無法前進。祇有引擎的震動,悄悄穿過座椅,按摩著我的背脊;司機再度點上一根香煙,象徵著無言的抗議。此刻我的心智又回到了海上,回到了我在船上的窄小房間,海搖著船,輪機吼著我的耳……。我在海上的兄弟們,正飄浮在阿修羅擲下的花朵間;而我的心中,正攜帶著整個海洋的重量。

translation I got into the back seat of a taxi, which was stuck in the heavy traffic and couldn’t edge forward regardless of the traffic light’s color. The engine’s vibration silently penetrating the seat was massaging my back. Without saying a word, the driver lit up another cigarette as a gesture of protest. At that moment, my thoughts traveled back to the sea again, visiting my narrow room on the vessel, with the sea swaying the ship and the turbines roaring at my ears…. My seaman brothers were sailing among the flowers cast into the sea by Asuras, while my mind was carrying the weight of the whole sea.

【本文出處】 《鋼鐵蝴蝶》,林燿德著,聯合文學出版,第 232 頁至 241 頁。

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