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英文的翻譯過程
撰文者: Wayne 發表日期: October 22, 2011 – 5:02 am

翻譯的過程通常包含下面三個步驟:

一、分析 (Analysis) :挖掘各個層次的語義。

二、轉換 (Transfer):將大腦分析好的語言材料從原文轉到譯入語。

三、重建 (Restructuring):將原文訊息在譯入語中表達出來。

譯者進行翻譯時,就是反覆做這三個步驟,若是在任何一個環節犯下錯誤,譯文就會出毛病。下面是版主教授翻譯的部分資料,供有興趣的網友參考:

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(範例一)

On one of those sober and rather melancholy days, in the latter part of Autumn, when the shadows of morning and evening almost mingle together, and throw a gloom over the decline of the year, I passed several hours in rambling about Westminster Abby.

本句很長,包括由數個圖像組成的「意群」 。我們可以將這個長句拆解成短小的句子:

a. Late autumn days are somber and rather melancholy.

b. The shadows of morning and evening mingle together.

c. The shadows throw a gloom over the decline of the year.

d. I went to Westminster Abby on one of those days.

e. I spent several hours rambling about the abby.

將分析好的句子重組,以通順的筆法轉換成譯入語。
【譯文比較】
translation
時方晚秋,氣象肅穆,略帶憂鬱,早晨的陰影和黃昏的陰影幾乎連接在一起,不可分別,歲將雲暮,終日昏暗,我就在著這麼一天,到西敏大寺去散步了幾個鐘頭。
(夏濟安譯)
translation
晚秋時節,氣象肅穆,憂鬱愁悶,晨昏陰影相連,幾乎難以分別。歲暮天陰,鬱鬱沉沉,就在此季的某一日,我前往西敏寺,閒逛了數個鐘頭。
(版主譯)
參考資料:《英漢翻譯理論與實踐》葉子南著,書林出版,第 58 頁 – 59 頁。

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(範例二)

流言難免是虛張聲勢,危言聳聽,鬼鬼祟祟一起來,它們聞風而動,隨風而去,摸不到頭,抓不到尾。然而,這城市裡的真心,卻唯有到流言裡去找的。無論這城市的外表有多華美,心卻是一顆粗鄙的心,那心是寄在流言裡的,流言是寄在上海的弄堂裡的。這東方巴黎遍佈遠東的神奇傳說,剝開殼看,其實就是流言的芯子。就好像珍珠的芯子,其實是粗糙的沙粒,流言就是這顆沙粒一樣的東西。
– 王安億《長恨歌》

本句很長,包括由數個圖像組成的「意群」 。我們也可以將這個長句拆解成短小的句子:

1. 流言難免虛張聲勢且危言聳聽。

2. 流言一旦鬼鬼祟祟,便會聞風而動且隨風而去,摸不到頭,抓不到尾。

3. 然而,上海這城市的真心唯有到流言裡去找。-> 這裡語氣有轉折

4. 無論上海 (這城市) 的外表有多華美,心卻是粗鄙的。

5. 這顆粗鄙的心寄在流言裡,而流言又寄在上海弄堂裡。

6. 上海號稱東方巴黎,那裡遍佈遠東的神奇傳說。

7.  剝開傳說的殼來看,核心就是流言。

8.  珍珠的核心其實是粗糙的沙粒。

9.  流言如同沙粒。

將分析好的句子重組,以通順的筆法轉換成譯入語。

【譯文比較】

translation

Gossip cannot help but be swashbuckling and sensational. It travels in the company of monsters and goblins; rising with the wind, its elusive tail can never be caught. Only in gossip can the true heart of this city be found. No matter how gorgeous and splendid the city may look on the outside, its heart is vulgar. That heart is born of gossip, and gossip is born of the Shanghai longtang. Magnificent tales of the Far East can be heard all over this Paris of the Orient; but peel away the outer shell and you will discover that gossip lies at its core. Like the center of a pearl – which is actually a rough grain of sand – coarse sand is the material of which gossip is made.
– translated by Michael Berry & Susan Chan Egan

translation

Gossip cannot help but be swashbuckling and sensational. It travels in a sneaky way, rising and going with the wind. One can never catch its elusive head or tail. However, only in gossip can the true heart of this city be found. No matter how gorgeous and splendid the city may look on the outside, its heart is vulgar. That heart is born of gossip, and gossip is born of the Shanghai longtang. Magnificent tales of the Far East can be heard all over this Paris of the Orient; but peel away the outer shell and you will discover that gossip lies at the core. The center of a pearl as we know it is actually a rough grain of sand, so gossip can be analogically described as that coarse grain of sand.
(版主譯)

外國譯者理解有偏差:

1. 誤解「鬼鬼祟祟一起來」這句話的真正意思,因此寫出 It travels in the company of monsters and goblins 這樣的怪句子。版主認為,外國譯者看到這句話時,腦中將其分析成下面的結構:

鬼鬼 = monster

祟祟 = goblin

一起來 =  in the company of

真是錯得離譜,八竿子都沒打著。

2. 最後一句是關於沙粒與流言的對比,譯者沒有吃透原文而犯了錯誤。想也知道,流言是不可能用沙粒來製成 (coarse sand is the material of which gossip is made)。

網友可參考版主繪製的分析圖案,便可精確抓住王安億小姐要表達的意思。

gossip

參考資料:The Song of Everlasting Sorrow [A Novel of Shanghai], translated by Michael Berry & Susan Chan Egan, published by Columbia University Press  New York

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